(What if Scrooge was an atheist?)

There was once a hard working entrepreneur named Ebenezer Scrooge. Who labored industriously in his little business firm just to make ends meet.

Although he had been amassing enough wealth for a small fortune, he knew darn well that nobody would reserve any respect for those who had no money.

It was in the midst of a so-called Christmas Season when one of Ebenezer Scrooge’s underling, a clerk by the name of Bob Cratchit ask for his help, regarding his crippled son named Tiny Tim. Scrooge told Cratchit that he is still doing some inventories for the company that he could not immediately help Mr. Cratchit in his problem. Mr. Cratchit took this as a refusal and sadly left for home.

The Christmas season is upon us many had said, but Scrooge dismissed the whole tradition. He had reasons not to celebrate the season, far more than just “finding yourself a year older, and not an hour richer”.

For one thing, Ebenezer knows far too well that Christmas is nothing but a “pagan” celebration called “Feast of the Winter Solstice”...It was the birthday of the ancient god “Mithra” and scheming Christians took this holiday and dressed it up to become “Jesus Christ’s” birthday.

But it seemed the human race had embraced this tomfoolery and is gullible enough to take it for granted.

Ebenezer Scrooge also saw the hypocrisy of this season; he saw how the rich amassed gifts, toys and abundance of food. While the truly needy folk scurries in the corners of the street, still begging for alms, freezing in the cold.

Mankind is too pretentious, singing their carols, carving their turkeys, clergies sing praises to a defunct and foreign god, while a larger half of the population starve and sleep in the evening snow. Surely, if one comprehends all this, if one could muster all logic and observe the tradition objectively, “Humbug” is the toned down, right word to describe the season of abomination.

“A true lover of mankind, giving all the resources and necessary steps could help his fellow even without this Christmas rubbish...” Ebenezer told himself. “You don’t have to be a show-off, give love and gifts in just one day or season...A true righteous slob can give gifts, love and goodwill the whole year ‘round.”

After finishing his inventories, Ebenezer hid his gains in a safe, but left a large amount and put it in a separate safe box.

That night, Ebenezer retires.

But suddenly, he was awakened by the spirit of his former business partner, Jacob Marley. 

Frightfully looking, Jacob Marley warned Scrooge that he will be visited by the ghosts of Christmas Past, Christmas Present and Christmas Future.

But Scrooge stood up from bed and told Jacob Marley’s ghost to haunt those clergies and parish priests who had been deceiving the majority about Christmas instead. He even chastised the visiting spirit of being deceived by the whole Christmas thing!

Jacob Marley’s ghost just stood there, mouth hanging down as Scrooge, told him about the true nature of Christmas.

As soon as Jacob Marley’s ghost vanishes, Ebenezer Scrooge sat beside his bookshelf and opened a biography book of Charles Darwin, waiting for the ghost of “Christmas Past” to drop by.

The ghost of “Christmas Past” arrived and showed Scrooge about his past. But Scrooge countered with his own visions of “Christmas Past”; Scrooge showed the ghost how heretics and pagan protesters died in the torture chambers and garrotes from the hands of zealot Christians just to impose Christmas as Lord Jesus’ birthday. He showed the ghost of “Christmas Past” how Christians stole Mithra’s birthday and turns it into Jesus’ birthday. The “Ghost of Christmas Past” bowed its head in shame and turned away.

Scrooge smiled and went back to his readings. Then came the Ghost of Christmas Present; the ghost looked like “Santa Clause” that had a horrible, decaying face. Scrooge only laughs at the ghost and said it fits the image of the season perfectly. The ghost showed Scrooge what people thought of him behind his back. The ghost even showed Scrooge Tiny Tim and his sorrowful condition.

But Scrooge took the ghost’s beard and hauled him to the streets, where the sad, the forgotten and downtrodden walked the icy streets. He even showed the ghost all the rich and powerful merrily enjoying Christmas with their children, gifts, food and yule log.

Then, Ebenezer Scrooge cussed at the “Ghost of Christmas Present”, telling him what a pretentious bastard he is, just like the rich followers of the season!

Because of intense indignity, the “Ghost of Christmas Present” dissolves into a foul vapor, never to return.

Again, Ebenezer Scrooge sits back into his couch and begins to read, this time a book about Richard Dawkins.

The “Ghost of Christmas Future” arrives radiating a cold, death-like atmosphere. Ebenezer Scrooge chuckled at the sight and shook his head; he told the visitor to be “more original” for the “Ghost of Christmas Future” resembles the likeness of Charon, the boatman of the river Styx in Greek Mythology.

 “Christmas is already a pagan festivity, stolen by sweet Jesus, now they try to dress you up too?” was Ebenezer’s laughing words.

 The ghost showed Ebenezer what will be the world like after Ebenezer’s death. But to the ghost’s surprise, the ghost saw that Ebenezer’s epitaph was done in marble and he was buried in the grounds of a large university with an inscription saying: “For dear Ebenezer, we owe him the light that erased all ignorance.”

It turned out that Ebenezer have abolished Christmas and Tiny Tim, who had grown up erected a large university dedicated to science, commerce and technology to enlighten the whole town from traditional deceit and superstitions.

Ebenezer was later mobbed down and clubbed to death by the last remaining Christian zealots who were considered criminals by the town mayor.

Ebenezer just looked at “The Ghost of Christmas Future” and waved goodbye. The ghost sneered and left defeated. Ebenezer just sat down and read a book about Carl Sagan.

Suddenly, the room was filled with “holy light”.

 Ebenezer stood up and saw the so-called “loving-savior” Jesus Christ standing in front of him. Ebenezer stood up and stared at Jesus in the eye, face to face.

The image just stood there, motionless.

Ebenezer confronted the unmoving image.

“What is your true purpose of deceiving the whole world?

There are many savior gods before you... most of them, you blatantly stole their concept...perhaps you’re nothing but an assembled icon, used by those who entail their will against others. So be gone and be gone I say!”

The image of Jesus gradually fizzled out of sight.

Thus, Ebenezer had a good night sleep.

In the morning, Ebenezer took the separated money he hid in his other safe and paid a visit to Mr. Crichat’s house. He used the money to put Tiny Tim to a hospital where Tiny Tim was cured from his ailment.

That night, Mr. Crichat’s family invited Scrooge to their Christmas banquet. He was assigned to read a Christmas story. But instead, Mr. Scrooge read to them the history of pagan Christmas and challenged the folks to scrutinize the claims of religion. Because of this, Tiny Tim was inspired to search for the truth...